Sunday, January 31, 2010

As soon as this bullshit of work is done and retirement strikes watch out.

It's very true the moniker South Park places on people like me...."Old hippie douche bag". The older i get the worse (or better dependent on your viewpoint)
i get...

There are many many times everyday at work when i'll think what a mistake i made....why oh why did i screw up by becoming straight? How I should have stayed the way i was in 1968... grew the crop and stayed out of the world----because baby boomers like myself had a shot at doing that---we could have stayed cozy in the VW van with Moon Baby and the weed having never taken that fateful step out of the magic bus into trickle down economics, Gordon Gecko and the wall street world of the future. We could have changed the world back then...

But Nooooo. Those of us lucky enough to have experienced that world could not keep recreating it on a daily basis against the forces of pressures surrounding was impossible to keep the----get married, get broke, get credit cards, get rich, get stuff and more stuff, get divorced (a lot) get rid of that Volkswagen, cut your hair, piss in this bottle if you want this job, and just say no.....The grey flannel conspiracy would rather, and did have us working 18 hrs. a day hyped on coke as compared to calling in sick a bunch to watch old movies at home while stoned. Efficiency you know, bottom line. We couldn't resist the pressure and honestly---we sold our souls. Things could have been very,very different right now.

This weirdness in the country surrounding me is created by my failures and the failures of boomers like me to have just said no, NO to Republicanism, wars in the desert, suburbia, SUV's, die at work syndrome, 24 hour cable TV, ab blasters, plastic surgery, weed wackers, doggie day care, and allowing fundamentalist religious people to actually vote or be on TV.
You know there are so many small things we allowed to be prostituted that i am ashamed of the list is endless here's two small examples---- FM radio used to be something--- something important, something underground, powerful and cutting edge--we used to listen to it, and get high-----now it is computerized broadcast garbage. When a new album was released we used to all get together and really listen to the music---in groups, discuss it and enjoy it and of course get very high. We only worked enough part time jobs to get what we needed and of course to get routinely high. Moon baby didn't go to bed with you because your were a company vice-president driving a Porsche and had a 401k---Moon baby went to bed with you if she, thought your were cute and could get high with you.
We boomers had a system in our hippie douche bag youth---which has never been equaled. Until now.....

As retirement looms on the 4 year horizon for me--i am planning on returning to those good old hippie douche bag days the instant, the very instant i retire because after all it is a big cycle is it not? baby to youth to adult to middle age to old age back to baby?
My alternative plan is however---- baby to hippie douche bag to adult to middle age to proudly hippie douche bag out Xers there are going to have a problem with us boomers in retirement cause i believe there are a lot of people my age planning this--they just aren't admitting it!
Oh Moon Baby, I'm hoooome!

As Hudson said in Aliens "Maybe he should be in charge!"

This is the perfect 'Gran Torino' non-violent solution to neighborhood trespassing...."get off my lawn!" The fully automatic paintball sentry gun.

Jesus Christ how we cower like sheep---this is what the Nigerian inept crotch bomber is going to cost us.... for nothing other than security theater.

If it ever does happen to you here are hints and tips on how to survive a fall from 35,000 feet--it's been done several times. PS---you are statistically more likely to survive if you are a crew member--you bastards!

The most recent addition to my action figure collection-----is the dyingest action figure of them all, Kenny from South Park----Kenny is on my shelves.
You Bastards....I decided I would be too weirdly focused by staying with science fiction/fantasy characters so....Kenny. I also purchased a 1/12th scale Vespa scooter (chow)and a black Moto Guzzi crotch rocket motorcycle. These I purchased simply because I had the overwhelming desire the other day to go out a buy a really fast motorcycle because I'm bored with myself----- but being old-- I quieted the fires, compromised so to say, by buying a model of what i wanted...hey it may work.

There is a vast world of work out there in this country, where at least 111 million people are employed in this country alone - many of whom are bored out of their minds. All day long.
Richard Nelson Bolles

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