Thursday, November 15, 2012

Projective Geometry

Enjoying the final few days of leave....finishing the odd small projects that take my notice...i need to find something to read material that interests me has become difficult to find recently....

I can surprise myself I've found. One gets into a habit of thinking of oneself in a particular manner--becomes established in daily protocols and believes that this is my case being a hermit. I love my home and being with my wife. People I interact with at work consider me a hermit since I would rather be at home than anywhere else. I've amazed myself recently by becoming involved with a few other people in meeting every two weeks for coffee at a local Starbucks to discuss our shared hobby of military modeling. Not only am i dumbfounded in that i would actually do this, but more so that i actually look forward to it.....I've discovered that it is actually pleasant to go out to, what I call a third good place, a coffee shop, sit, talk and leave. I feel as if I am less controlled by the work-sleep syndrome and am actually using my local community a very, very strange thing for me to do----

I'll be out gathering Pecans. We were lucky in that we had a windstorm a few days ago which dropped this year's pecans into the yard. Now the raking and shoveling begins...I dislike this time of year..the gardens are dead and gone. Everything turns brown and what was once full of life now appears dead and trashed....because of the way the lot looks and feels I have difficulty doing anything of any value out there. 
We are still canning the results of the past excellent garden season, and this year for the first time we are canning meat as well...tonight i am planning on shelling and jarring some of this years pecans...

I finished our interior project for my fall/winter vacation in that i rebuilt our library area...and JoJo's computing area...building shelving..installing IKEA hanging desks..reorganizing..I admit that it was a more of a job and took more time that what i ever considered when planning on doing it...but...we will get years of use with the changes and I could not have done it over consecutive weekends---I would have lost my way. 

I have been struggling with an attempt to develop a level of positivity in my mental life...Not with the intent of becoming that insane type of positive human that drives everyone surrounding them crazy, you know the type---but to develop some type of a brain balance between positivity and realism...I have been wrestling with this thought experiment question over my vacation time--can one be a realist but not spent your life in a muddy, mental pit of what you see around you? 
Can one be a survivalist, a prepper, a homesteader, based on reason and not mentally circle around the depressive drain of everything is shitty?  Can one view the world rationally, without depression? At this point of my thought experiment i am unable to answer that question....I can only attempt changes then await and examine the results on me as an individual....but i am trying.

"The superior man understands what is right;
the inferior man understands what will sell."

1 comment:

David Scott said...

Warren - there has always been a duality of who I was at work and who I am at home. Simply I always been able to separate them into two lives. - my youngest followed into a similar field as I worked as he came into contact with others who I had inspected their work. They sympathize with him telling him it must of been tough growing up with me as a Dad. He couldn't dispel their belief I was a hard ass. - he knew me as a easy going and as a Dad who sacarfice to do things for his kids and put them first. - Point, one doesn't have anything to do with the other. - just never let them see you sweat.